By Five Towns Marriage Initiative
The story goes that there were three men talking in a halfway house. The first one said that if there is a low fence keeping them locked inside, he will climb it and escape. The second fellow said that if there is a high fence gating them in, he will drill a hole through it and break free. The third fellow walked off for a minute and then returned to the others. He said, “It’s a lost cause; there is nothing that can be done. We are stuck inside. There is no fence!”
Sometimes we perceive limitations in our minds that have no basis in reality. We allow attitudes and preconceived notions to hold us back from being the best spouse we can be. We think that our spouse’s job is to make us happy so we wait around for him to make the first move. We think that we are entitled to a spotless home so we grump about it all day instead of accepting that our spouse might make the house clean enough and that’s good, too. We should merit to break free of that which restrains us from actualizing the potential in our marriages. v
Five Towns Marriage Initiative provides educational programs, workshops, and referrals to top marriage therapists. FTMI will help offset counseling costs when necessary and also runs an anonymous shalom bayis hotline for the entire community Sunday, Tuesday, and Thursday evenings, 10:00—11:00 p.m. For the hotline or for more information, call 516-430-5280 or e‑mail


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