I was very young when I got married for the first time. When I came home from seminary I only dated boys who learned full-time, and that’s the type of boy I married. We got divorced for many reasons. Not having that much money was not the reason we got divorced, but I did hate having to penny-pinch.
I wasn’t divorced that long when a shidduch was redt to me. He was supposedly rich, and he was very generous with me. He moved us into a big beautiful house. But not long after we got married, he became very cheap with me, even about household things. He spent money on what he thought was important. I used to complain, and he would tell me that he is the one bringing in the money, and that was it. We fought all the time, and I then got divorced for the second time. This was years ago, and because I had young children, I wanted to wait until they got a little older before I started dating again.
My rich ex-husband didn’t give me a dime after the divorce, and I struggled very badly, barely having food to eat. I am on my feet again, and now I am seeing a man who just has a set paycheck. He is very nice to me, and I can tell he is different from my two ex-husbands. But if I marry him, the only place we could afford to live would be in an apartment. I live in an apartment now, but I can’t live like that for the rest of my life. I enjoyed the beautiful house I lived in with my second husband, even though there were so many other problems with the way he treated me. I am torn and I don’t know what to do. Does it have to be one or the other? Can a man be rich and nice, too?