By Michele Herenstein

I’ve changed as an adult. I’ve become wiser. More sensitive. Compassionate and empathetic. And people react differently to me as I change. I try to stay away from conflict because I don’t like arguments, and some people are gifted with their words, just not in a positive manner. I try to never get into an argument in which the person will most probably outwit me with words. I’m content with myself and my decisions and I can stand up for myself. I’ve made new friends, not necessarily my age. I have friends 20 years younger and 30 years older. I’m open to the person themselves, not the person’s negative attitude or characteristic.

My favorite thing is being able to do a random act of kindness. Obviously it’s random so you can’t will it to happen. But that’s the kind of thing I want my days to consist of. Good deeds, listening to people who need to vent, learning new things from new people, and helping save someone’s life when they’re in an emergency.

My new friends are more spiritual. I love that they try to see the world the way I do. Reading “Living Emunah” and saying Tehillim make my life dearer. Deeper. Tehillim is on my iPhone. All I have to do when I have free time is say a chapter of Tehillim. That’s an awesome feeling.

I watch my physical health, emotional health, and mental health. I work with a nutritionist. I made mishloach manot two weeks in advance. I get excited when I can do a mitzvah that is exciting and fun for me.

I have people who support me, for the first time in a long time. Really support me. They have my back. And I hope I have theirs. I’ve never said I love you to as many people as I have in the last year. And I truly mean it. It’s so sincere.

It’s so important to be touched. Hugs can bring comfort and love, and touch is so important.

Sometimes I’ll want to flee, hide, or cry in frustration. But it usually goes away. Life can certainly be tough sometimes. An adult learns to cope with the rough situations.

Knowing I can get comfort, from songs, podcasts, or from the people I love is the best thing.

According to the article “34 Ways You Change As You Become An Adult,” by Lexi Herrick in the Huffington Post, there are many ways to change as an adult. I’ll name a few…

  • “You don’t feel the need to gossip anymore….
  • You handle conflict directly maturely and respectfully.
  • You know how to apologize and admit fault.
  • You stop chasing the people who don’t want you….
  • You can, and do, say no….
  • You gain more patience….
  • You let go of grudges and realize how meaningless they truly are….
  • You’re braver.
  • You’re stronger ….

Adulthood is a journey into strength and self-empowerment. Being an adult means being who you are. It means experiencing and appreciating the aspects of life you learned were worth your efforts. It’s an opportunity. It’s courageousness. It’s kindness. It’s thankfulness. It’s respect. It’s knowledge. It’s life, and here you are starting to figure some of it out. So, good for you. Rejoice in the wonders of a lifetime of growth.”

Dear readers, work on becoming an adult no matter what your age, and let new people into your life. You’ll become a “new person” and be able to use your life-changing ways. If you see someone who seems to become a new friend, don’t dilly dally, make them a new friend. You never know how important this person will be in your new life.

If you want a new friend, I’m here. And hopefully new friends will open up to new friends and new ideas.

Become a new person — a new adult — and your life might change for the better.

Michele Herenstein can be reached at


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