By Rabbi Binyamin Silver, Esq.
As these words are being written, the world remains in a state of anxiety as it awaits the Iranian regime’s threatened retaliation. I hope and pray that by the time these words are read, the threat will have been neutralized and we will have emerged victorious without any casualties on our side.
Of course, this fear and dread is unfortunately wholly apropos to the period of the Nine Days. From biblical times to modern history, these days have been filled with difficult and challenging circumstances for the Jewish people. Beginning with the “cry for naught” of the meraglim, they have been designated as tear drenched days filled with tragedy and tzaros.
Interestingly enough, however, the megillah (Eichah 1:15) refers to Tishah B’Av as a “moed.” While the term “moed” literally means a “set time,” it is almost exclusively used in reference to happy and upbeat occasions and seems inappropriate as a description for the day of Tishah B’Av.
The classic explanation for this odd application of the word “moed” (which has halachic ramifications regarding the omission of Tachanun), is that it is a reference to the future, following the ultimate geulah. Frankly, I never found this explanation particularly satisfying as the simple read of the pasuk appears to apply the term to the contemporary day of Tishah B’Av as described in Megillas Eichah, and not the day at some future time. (Additionally, from a halachic perspective, why would we omit Tachanun now if Tishah B’Av is only intended to be treated as a “moed” in the future?)
Several years ago, I had the privilege of hearing an explanation from Rabbi Eliezer Breitowitz, shlita. While he developed the idea far more elaborately and eloquently than I am able to do in the few lines allotted here, his basic thesis is as follows:
The Jewish calendar is filled with days intended to allow us to utilize our full range of emotions within the service of Hashem. As Jews, we are meant to serve Hashem using our full humanity; with joy on Sukkos, with a renewed energy on Pesach, a sense of awe and fear on Rosh Hashanah, and a feeling of angelic holiness on Yom Kippur. As part of this all-encompassing experience, we are also meant to serve Hashem through a sense of loss and mourning. This is what Tishah B’Av is about—channeling the power of loss in the service of G-d.
Loss is incredibly powerful. Many times, it is only through focusing on something that we no longer have that we are able to truly appreciate what we once had. Mourning is a powerful connector. It makes us feel particularly connected to the person or thing that we are mourning.
In fact, a recommended negotiating technique is framing your opponent’s position as a loss thereby invoking the loss aversion principle. The loss aversion principle refers to the tendency for people to prefer avoiding losses rather than acquiring equivalent gains. Well documented studies by Daniel Kahneman and Amos Tversky have demonstrated that losses are psychologically about twice as powerful as gains of the same size. Thus, having your opponent focus on what can be lost, is more likely to motivate them to concede.
We have recently seen this phenomenon play out in the political arena as well. The sugar high, irrational euphoria for the Harris campaign can only be explained through the loss aversion principle. The excitement for her campaign comes as a result of democratic voters contemplating the inevitable defeat of Mr. Biden to Mr. Trump, i.e. a focus on loss of the presidency. This focus on loss, when rechanneled, has generated outsized and largely unfounded excitement for the Harris campaign, a candidate who was so deeply unpopular that up until two weeks ago, consistently polled at a 35% favorability rating (meaning 2 out of 3 people viewed her as unfavorable).
So too, l’havdil, focusing on the distance created between us and Hashem over the course of the Nine Days culminating with Tishah B’Av can be a source of reconnection with, and renewal of, our relationship with Hashem
Rabbi Breitowitz explained, that a “moed” is in fact not a happy occasion. Rather it is a designated time for a unique form of worship, a worship that is different than the standard daily worship. Sometimes the “moed” is a day designated for worship through rejoicing as in the Shalosh Regalim, and other times, the “moed” is a time designated for worship through mourning, such as Tishah B’Av. Moed, simply connotes a time set aside for a unique moment of connection with Hashem, be it happy or sad. Accordingly, Tishah B’Av is justly referred to as a “moed” for it is indeed a day meant to connect with Hashem through a unique form of worship—worship through mourning. In closing, I pray that we merit to deeply connect with Hashem on this Tishah B’Av such that we experience the ultimate geulah, b’karov b’yamenu. n
Rabbi Binyamin Silver, Esq. is the rabbi of the Young Israel of Long Beach, a picturesque and growing year-round community minutes from Far Rockaway and the Five Towns. Rabbi Silver may be reached at rabbi@yilb.org.
